A Comical Engagement
by IrisLillian
Summary: Tamaki purposes to Haruhi in the back of an icecream truck with a fat man in a tutu watching! Watch their crazy journey to marriage along with the rest of the Host Club!


One sunny day, oh, scratch that! One rainy and depressing day at Ouran Academy, students took no notice of the weather and buzzed about happily. Including the handsome boys (and one girl) of the Host Club. Haruhi Fujioka lounged about on a fancy couch in Music Room 3, waiting for the rest to arrive. For once she was actually early and took this quiet time to prepare herself for the riot that was soon to come once the King of the Host Club, Tamaki Suoh, stepped through the door.

"Hey, Haru-Chan!" The Host Club's littlest (and deadliest) boy launched himself at the girl, enveloping her in a big bear hug. His bitch-I mean, loyal cousin-Mori, stood back and watched, giving Haruhi a nod in greeting. She smiled back.

"Hello, Hunny-Senpai. How are you today?" She asked politely.

"Oh, I'm great! Although, the weather is a little bit of a downer. But, hey, that's nothing a little cake can't fix!"

Haruhi smiled and shook her head at the boy's addiction. One day he was going to end up being a fat little ball of cute. The doors of the Music Room burst open, announcing the arrival of the only one who was obnoxious enough to throw the doors open like like that. Tamaki Suoh skipped in. . .now sporting pink hair.

"Uh. . .Tamaki-Senpai, why is your hair pink?"

The blonde, er, pink headed bafoon smiled hugely and started to do a little dance of happiness (for some reason he was wearing tap dancing shoes!:D). "Ain't I cute?" he fluttered his mascaraed eyelashes, "I thought it would be attention grabbing!"

"Attention whore!" Mori coughed. Everyone turned to him in confusion.

"Did you say something, Mori-Senpai?" Tamaki cocked his head to the side like a puppy. A very retarded puppy.

"Uh," Mori grunted.

"Oh! You didn't? And your pants are too tight? Okay then. But you should know that being the sluts we are-um, _Hosts_ that we are, our pants can never be too tight!" Tamaki turned around to show off his butt as proof. (A/N; That's hot, am I right?;D)

Haruhi couldn't help but ogle his well shaped behind. And then she got all giggly and tried to hold back a nose bleed. Tamaki looked back.

"Oh, Haruhi! You little minx! Were you checking out Daddy's butt?"

The girl blushed and adverted her eyes. "Shut up, you ninnie! I would never check out your flat ass!" she lied.

Tamaki bursted into tears and ran to the corner. Just then Kyoya stepped out of the dressingroom wearing only his black pants and a zebra print bra. (A/N; Is it just me or is that an oddly hot image?)

"Kyouya?"

"Yes, Haruhi?"

"Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're wearing a bra. . ."

"Thank you, Captain Freaking Obvious!" Kyoya glared at her. Was she implying he didn't look super sex-a-licious? He'd fix her! 1,000 more yen would be added to her debt! Suddenly, he let out his best insane laugh that would put even Light Yagami to shame. Everyone looked at him. Even Tamaki stopped sobbing into his sexy knees to look at the Demon Overlord.

Kyoya cleared his throat. "Right. Well, if you must know, our theme today is Victoria Secret Models. Did none of you notice the pink girly angel wings and sexy underwear hanging everywhere?"

They all made a show of taking a look at their surroundings.

"Oh, hey! I guess you're right!"

"How did I not notice this before?"

"Yay! Pink! Can I wear a bra with bunnies on it?"

"Ah."

The twins suddenly came out of no where!

"Sexy-" Hikaru started.

"Underwear?" Kaoru finished.

They flashed double Cheshire Cat smirks at Haruhi.

"What the crap? Did you guys float down from the ceiling or something?"

"No, Tono."

"And by the way-"

"Nice hair."

"Squee! Thanks! Glad to know someone-Hey! Wait a second! Was that sarcasm?"

"Oh no! Not at all!" They rolled their golden cat-like eyes.

Tamaki being the moron that he was, was completely reassured. And now for the awkward silence! Everyone in the room just stared at Kyoya, who was now striking poses in a mirror and smearing a cupcake on his abbs.

"KYOYA!"

Kyoya dropped his cupcake and shot an icy look at Tamaki. "There's no need to shout, bitch!"

"Can I wear a pink bra? I want it to match my hair!"

"Sure."

"Please, Kyoya!"

"I just said that you cou-"

"PLEASE!"

"I SAID YES!"

"I WANT A PINK BRA, MOMMY!" Tamaki began to hystericlly cry.

"YOU MAKE ME WANT TO SCRATCH MY EYES OUT!"

"-"

Kyouya then smashed a lamp over the blonde's head. And everyone changed into their super sex-a-licious bras! Except Haruhi! Wearing something that revealing would make it obvious (even to the idiot customers) that she was a girl. So instead, she was shoved into a bunny costume.

"HOP, BUNNY, HOP!" Kyouya cackled while Haruhi hopped around, gnawing on a carrot.

"Ooooooooooooh! Sexy bunny!" Tamaki giggled on the floor. He had just woken up and was now petting a cat. Haruhi paused her hopping.

"Tamaki? What's that?"

"A cat."

"OKay, I know that. I meant, why do you have it?"

"Because it's fluffy."

"That's all?"

"That's all."

"I didn't see you have it when you walked in. Where did it come from?"

"My pants."

". . .You put a cat in your pants?"

"Yes!" he grinned proudly.

"Actually," Kyouya pushed his glasses up his nose, now recovered from his moment of insanity, "it walked in. That's not his cat and it didn't come from his pants. He just said that so that you would ask what else he had in his pants. He wanted to show you what was in there. Because he's a pervert and wants to get you into bed."

_I wouldn't have minded!_ Haruhi mentally screamed. Then she realized she had said that out loud.

"YAY! Haruhi wants to see what's in Daddy's pants!" Tamaki glomped the girl.

"You have no idea how much of an incestous pervert you are, do you?" Kaoru asked. He was wearing a purple lacy bra!:}

"WHAT! Haruhi, don't you want to see what's in your brother's pants?" Hikaru yelled. He was wearing a red lacy bra!

"More like what _isn't _in your pants!" Mori high-fived himself. Again, everyone looked at him.

"Mori. . .I keep thinking that I'm hearing you speak." Tamaki thought on it for a moment but waved the thought aside, "But that's not possible! You're to illiterate to do anything besides grunt!"

Mori fell to the floor in rage and began strangling an invisible person. We can safely assume that person was Tamaki.


End file.
